Back to school… again…

*sigh* I didn’t sleep well last night and woke up at 7:35am (I’m supposed to wake up at 6:50am). I’ve been thinking about figures till 3:00am-4:00am T_T, that’s why I didn’t sleep well… Morning classes were so boring… That portuguese teacher, here she goes again… she always talk about her while explaining the text… But sometimes she tell us something interesting… We did nothing but just listen to her. I feel so sleepy in Math class… Here I go again… I am listening to F/SN OP2 now… I think I really need to improve my english, I know I wrote alot of grammar or whatever errors…

OK… I ate some snack known as “Little Egg” (in chinese) to fill me up… I dont have appetite to eat anything… Time is 1:02pm, going out at 2:00pm to school… 3 more lessons… arggghh…
Looks like my father woke up.. So boring… I am going to edit this post again later at night…

I’m back… 10:20pm.. My father bought me a new dvd player… (china stuff, sucks) *sigh* Now I remembered another cause me sleep bad… It’s damnit mosquito… I swear I’ll never open the windows again. I need to clean my room… so many dust… Quite unusual for a girl’s room like that huh? That’s all for today, I have much more to say but.. no mood… later..

My Future…

I’ve been thinking about my future… There are something I must face soon or later… Yesterday, my father told me, he’ll sell the house we’re living and buy a smaller house just for us… Well.. I have no objection or there’s nothing I can do. I didn’t say anything, just listen. I wish there are something I can do… I want to study overseas but my father couldn’t afford it…
There are something funny about me… It’s I feel uncomfortable studying in Macau. Why? Maybe because I had alot of bad childhood memories running around… I’ve faced alot of difficulties, most of them were without anybodies help. When I’m at home, I dont want to study nor doing homework… But I want to do it… There are no proper place for me to do. Sometimes I always think, “What the hell am I doing?”… I dont really like to stick in front of my computer everyday, but… … …
I’ve been thinking about myself these holidays… What should I do? I know I can do something about it… But… I just can’t control myself. Only If I can study overseas… and It’s not going to happen. My grades are not that good, why? Because I dont want to study, but I’m feeling stupid by doing that… I think, I dont have any true friends beside me… I wish I have… Maybe that’s the reason I always sticking to my computer, talk to my internet friends instead of talking with my friends in Macau… None of my friends truly know about me… Some of my friends like to attack me with words… I hate.. but I don’t always show my emotion in front of my friends.
The mask I wore, is a heavy one… If I take it off, I dont think I can live… There are nobody that can truly understand me, help me or listen to me… For people that really found one, man… you’re lucky. I love to help people, but in the end, they treat me like a shit. When a friend of mine had asked me for help, I’ll do whatever I can… but… don’t think they’ll treat you real good… Sometimes I think, do I really deserve this? This world is cruel… Sometimes I found alot of happiness, but what I found more were sadness.
I think… I must find something for me to pursue… I don’t have a dream or something like that to pursue, maybe that makes me no motivation to do anything.
Now the problems I must face are:
1. What am I going to after graduating from 9th Grade? (I’ll try my best to pass… If I can control myself)
R: I dont know… I am studying Portuguese now, maybe I am going to study English…

I might going to edit this post If something comes up… later

New Fate/Stay Night OP!

Oh my god… New F/SN OP “Kirameku Namida wa Hoshi ni” by Sachi Tainaka (she did the 1st OP of F/SN) and I am not really disappointed but kinda like it… The animation and the OP fit very well… Almost all servants appeared in the OP… I can’t wait for the CD! (I am not going to buy thought) Man, I keep repeating the OP over and over (I ripped it from video). I think I am going to buy Densha Otoko in China (cheap cheap), but I might going to buy real copy because alot of gundams XD
OK… What should I do now… Play PS2 “MS Saga: A New Dawn” or… PC HoMM5 demo (Heroes of Might and Magic V)? Man… I’m a little disappointed… I can’t go China today with my father… He said next week… I’m feeling a little sad and bored too… God… Sister please give me back my camera!!! I want to take photos T_T
Oh btw… I almost forgot to say I watched School Rumble Season 2 ep2 yeterday… Akira had became much more cooler than in Season 1… I am shocked by her action… GO GO AKIRA! And… LOL Survival Game… I CAN’T BELIEVE ERI’S BUTLER DRESSED LIKE HER AND PARTICIPATED THE SURVIVAL GAME… I was.. “WHAT THE… OMG!! LOL LOL LOL”
I can’t wait for ep3 T_T

Densha Otoko! “Train Man”

Oh my… Just watched Densha Otoko ep1… I am surprised that TV is airing Densha Otoko and so soon… *listening to Densha Otoko ED “Sekai wa sore no AI to Yobundaze” by Sambomaster* man, that song is good… I am so excited after seen so many gundams in Train Man’s room (Train Man is the main character, Japanese geek OTAKU in his early 20s) and some figures XD. I am an otaku too 😛
I MUST BUY DENSHA OTOKO DVD!! (13 episodes) AND YOU MUST BUY TOO!!

Oh btw… I just finished downloading Fate/Stay Night EP15… According to the game, in ep15, Shirou need to have sex with Saber in order to recover Saber’s mana… DAN DAN! I am going to watch it now…

Hello world!

Hello everyone! Welcome to my blog! (Hope I update it often >_>)